People You Should Never Trust
Marcus Aurelius Saw Them Coming
Ever had that gut feeling that someone isn’t as trustworthy as they seem? Maybe they say all the right things, but something just feels… off. Marcus Aurelius didn’t need social media, dating apps, or corporate politics to understand human nature—he studied people at their core. And he learned one truth: some people are simply not worth your trust.
He wrote, “The soul becomes dyed with the color of its thoughts.” The people you surround yourself with shape who you become. Trust the wrong people, and you let their influence stain your character, your peace, and your power.
So how do you know who to keep at arm’s length? Simple. Look at their actions, not their words. Watch for patterns, not apologies. And most importantly—never ignore that inner voice telling you something isn’t right. Let’s break down the exact types of people Marcus Aurelius warned us about.
How to Spot Fake Friends Before They Backstab You
There’s a special kind of betrayal that only comes from fake friends. They smile in your face, hype you up, and act like they have your back—until the moment it actually matters. Then? Silence. Worse, sometimes they’re the ones holding the knife.
These people are like WiFi signals—strong when you’re near, nonexistent when you need them most. Marcus Aurelius had a simple solution for dealing with them: “The best revenge is to be unlike him who performed the injury.” Don’t stoop to their level. Don’t chase them. Don’t try to expose them. Just be better. Let them reveal themselves through their actions.
If you want to test a friend’s loyalty, pay attention to how they talk about others when those people aren’t around. Because if they gossip to you, they gossip about you. A real friend doesn’t just stand with you in the room—they defend you when you’re not there to hear it.
Signs of Untrustworthy People
Don’t Ignore These Red Flags
Marcus Aurelius believed that the best way to protect yourself was through wisdom. And when it comes to trust, wisdom means knowing the warning signs before it’s too late. So what are the biggest red flags?
- They overpromise and underdeliver. If someone constantly makes big claims but never follows through, they’re selling you a fantasy, not reality.
- They play the victim—always. Nothing is ever their fault. They shift blame, dodge accountability, and somehow, every story ends with them as the misunderstood hero.
- They’re different around different people. If someone’s personality changes depending on who they’re talking to, they’re not authentic. And if they’re faking it with others, they’re faking it with you too.
- They guilt-trip you into doing things. A good person respects your boundaries. A manipulator makes you feel bad for having them.
Marcus Aurelius reminds us, “If it is not right, do not do it. If it is not true, do not say it.” The same goes for the people in your life. If someone’s words don’t match their actions, believe their actions.
Stoic Philosophy on Trust
Who Deserves Your Loyalty?
Trust is like a bank account. The right people make consistent deposits—loyalty, honesty, dependability. The wrong people make withdrawals—lies, manipulation, betrayal—until one day, your balance is empty.
So, who actually deserves your trust? According to Stoic wisdom, it’s simple:
- People who align their words with their actions. If they say they’ll be there, they show up. If they make a promise, they keep it. No excuses.
- People who tell you the truth, even when it’s uncomfortable. A real friend won’t just tell you what you want to hear; they’ll tell you what you need to hear.
- People who respect your time, energy, and boundaries. If they make you feel guilty for saying no, they don’t respect you—they just want control over you.
Marcus Aurelius put it best: “Waste no more time arguing what a good man should be. Be one.” The same applies to your circle. Stop debating who you hope people are. Pay attention to who they show you they are.
Why Manipulators Hate Stoic People
Manipulators thrive on emotional reactions. They want you to get angry, feel guilty, second-guess yourself—because the moment you lose control, they gain it. But a Stoic? A Stoic is their worst nightmare.
Marcus Aurelius taught that power comes from within. He wrote, “You have power over your mind—not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.” When you refuse to react the way a manipulator expects, their tactics crumble. They can’t guilt-trip you if you don’t absorb the guilt. They can’t bait you into a fight if you remain calm.
That’s why they despise Stoic people. They can’t control you, so they label you “cold,” “distant,” or “uncaring.” But that’s not your problem. Detachment isn’t indifference—it’s self-mastery. And when you master yourself, no one can use your emotions against you.
Watch Level Stoic Video About Benefits of Having No Friends
How Stoicism Protects You from Betrayal
Betrayal only hurts when trust was misplaced. And while you can’t control what others do, you can control how much access you give them. That’s where Stoicism comes in.
Marcus Aurelius reminds us: “A man’s worth is no greater than the worth of his ambitions.” Meaning? If someone’s ambition is self-serving, if they crave power, attention, or status, don’t be surprised when they use you to get it.
The Stoic approach is simple:
- Expect human nature. Don’t assume people will always act with honor—many won’t.
- Keep your circle small. Trust is a privilege, not a right. Not everyone deserves it.
- Detach from expectations. If you expect loyalty from the wrong person, you set yourself up for disappointment.
When betrayal happens, don’t waste time mourning the loss of a fake friend. See it as a lesson and move forward, wiser and stronger.
How to Outsmart Deceptive People
Silence is a weapon. It makes people uncomfortable. It forces them to reveal themselves. And when dealing with liars, manipulators, and deceivers, it’s your best defense.
A deceptive person wants you to talk—why? Because the more you speak, the more they can twist your words, use your emotions, and manipulate the narrative. That’s why Stoics valued silence.
Marcus Aurelius said, “It is not necessary to talk much to live well.” So when someone tries to deceive you:
- Observe. Pay attention to what they do, not just what they say.
- Resist the urge to explain yourself. The truth doesn’t need defending.
- Let them fill the silence. The more they talk, the more they expose themselves.
In a world full of noise, silence is power. It makes the right people respect you and the wrong people fear you.
Stoic Lessons on Trust
When to Give It and When to Walk Away
Trust isn’t about kindness. It’s about judgment. Give it too freely, and you’ll get burned. Withhold it too much, and you’ll isolate yourself. The key? Know when to give it—and when to walk away.
Marcus Aurelius kept it simple: “The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts.” And the people you trust influence those thoughts. So, when should you give trust? When someone has earned it, not when they ask for it.
And when should you walk away?
- When someone breaks their word—once is a mistake, twice is a pattern.
- When they make you feel guilty for setting boundaries.
- When their presence drains you more than it strengthens you.
Walking away isn’t weakness. It’s wisdom. The sooner you cut off the wrong people, the more space you create for the right ones.
How to Build a Stoic Inner Circle
Quality Over Quantity
Your circle determines your direction. Surround yourself with weak-minded people, and they’ll pull you into their drama. Surround yourself with strong, disciplined individuals, and they’ll push you toward greatness.
The Stoic approach? Quality over quantity. Marcus Aurelius wrote, “Associate with those who will make a better man of you.” Meaning? A small group of solid, trustworthy people is worth more than a hundred superficial connections.
So how do you build a Stoic inner circle?
- Look for those who value action over words. Empty promises mean nothing.
- Seek out people who challenge you. Comfort doesn’t create growth.
- Avoid those who thrive on gossip and negativity. If they talk about others, they’ll talk about you.
A strong circle doesn’t just support you—it sharpens you. Choose wisely.